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Chapter 90: Chapter 90

Ann soothed the man who was anxiously shifting on his steps, not knowing what to do. He was a man who didn’t know how to whisper words of love, when to push and when to pull.

“Your Grace, this is not the time. When she will be at her weakest that will be the chance to open her heart.”

Ann’s grey eyes sparkled with a serious look as she advised Edgar.

“Come as soon as the sun comes up tomorrow and tell her you are sorry. It will make her realize you are the only one she can rely on in this lonely place.”

“... as soon as the sun comes up tomorrow?”

It was as if time was slowing down, and Edgar felt greatly pained in his heart. That had been happening often lately, but this time the pain was stronger than ever.

“Yes, it will be when her heart is the most open.”

“Does it have to be in the morning? What about night... or evening?”

Ann moaned. Edgar had just acted as if he would do anything for Rubica, so she couldn’t see why he was saying that.

“Then, her heart will be so closed that nothing will be able to open it. Your Grace, you must go to her first thing in the morning.”

However, Edgar said nothing and now it was Ann’s turn to be anxious.

“Are you going to say you are busy? Yes, you are busy. Of course, I know that. But, do you want your relationship with your wife to remain cold forever? Do not say you must put your work first. Your Grace, you are the head of a family now. You are obliged to keep your family safe. Don’t even think about throwing all the burden to her, running away to work, and blaming her for not knowing what matters.”

Ann tried to explain it as calmly as possible, but she was so eager that she spoke emotionally in the last part. As a relative who was supposed to lead him to the right way, she was about to grab Edgar by his collar if he said work was his top priority.

However, even that thought was blown away when seeing his face turn as white as snow.

She was blaming him too much, but her Eddie didn’t protest. He didn’t say anything.

He just blankly stared as if he was someone who lost the most precious thing he had.

Edgar felt desperate, he could to anything but that. Ever since he was born, he always felt capable of everything.

Nothing was too difficult for him. He was the top of the class anywhere he went. Even when he met hardships, he was sure that he would soon get over them, so he wasn’t stressed.

When he was cursed, he felt tormented, but he strongly believed he would eventually break the curse. For the first time in his life, however, he felt incompetent.

“Ann.”

Edgar spoke in a heavy tone. He couldn’t go to Rubica tomorrow morning, so he had to choose the second worst thing.

“Get out of my way.”

Ann realized Edgar was thinking of going to Rubica now.

“No. Your Grace, have you been listening to me?”

“Move.”

The bedroom’s door was very thick. Still, he was worried the noise might reach Rubica and spoke between clenched teeth.

Ann beggingly looked at him while feeling sorry for him. Why was he going to take the second-worst option instead of the best way she just taught him?

“Ann, move.”

However, he was the duke and she was the housekeeper. She could try to stop him, but she couldn’t block his way. She had no choice but to step aside and let Edgar get into the duchess’ chamber.

Rubica was asleep. Only the sound of her breathing filled the dark room, so Edgar lighted a nearby candle and walked to the bed. He was planning to wake her up and talk.

It was not midnight yet. They had agreed to be together till midnight every night, so he thought that much would be fine.

However, his determination was shattered to pieces when he saw her sleeping.

She must have fallen asleep while crying as the pillow was wet, and her eyes had already swollen up. She was sleeping just like that, looking so sad.

Edgar couldn’t shake her just to wake her up and force her to listen to him.

He bravely went past Ann to come in, but now, he couldn’t do anything in front of Rubica. He couldn’t move as if he was enchanted.

“Um.”

He even took a step back in surprise when she moved during her sleep. She was so sad even when she was asleep as another drop of tear formed on her eyelashes.

He couldn’t wake her up. He just couldn’t. She had fallen asleep after being exhausted and waking her up felt like the worst thing to do.

He just stood still like a statue and stared down at her for a long time.

He let out a sigh and put the candle on a table. Then, he leaned down to lightly kiss the sleeping girl’s forehead.

“Goodnight.”

He wanted to wipe her tear, but he couldn’t as he feared it might wake her up.

As he came out, he felt like the greatest loser in the world.

Ann was relieved to see him coming out without waking up Rubica and asked him, again and again, to come back as soon as the sun came up, saying she would wake Rubica slightly later than usual.

Edgar just smiled bitterly.

***

While sleeping, Rubica could feel someone was staring at her. The gaze was warm but sad. She knew a man who sometimes looked at her like that.

‘Arman?’

It was him. Strangely, she just got that feeling. Arman wasn’t with her now, and she couldn’t find him, but she could tell the man in front of her was Arman.

Warm, kind, but sad... he was the only person who had such warmth, feeling and scent among the people she had met.

She wanted to open her eyes and look back at him. She wanted to yell that she knew he was Arman and there was no reason to lie about it. She wanted to hug him tightly and cry, saying although she didn’t know what he thought of her, she was in love with him.

Maybe he remembered, just like she remembered a distant future.

However, she couldn’t move. She wanted to at least open her eyes and see his face, but the day had been too exhausting, and her tired body didn’t even agree to move an eyelid.

Rubica felt an urgent feeling within her. If Arman had his memories, he might be disappointed that she wasn’t recognizing him right away.

Time mercilessly flowed. He let out a deep sigh. He stared at her for a long time and then leaned down. Soon warm and wet lips touched her forehead, then he left.

‘No.’

The sound of his footsteps walking to the door made her feel dizzy as if she was falling from a cliff.

She wanted to say that although she was wearing good dresses, eating delicacies, and doing well, she wasn’t truly well as he wasn’t with her, that she only appeared to be fine. She wanted to stop him and hold him.

Please don’t give me up like this. If you are here, please talk to me. At least give me a hint. Don’t leave.

However, despite her desperate wish, the door was closed with a thud.

Rubica moaned silently. She felt remorse deeper than despair. It was so sad. She couldn’t move, but tears came out of her eyes without any problem.

She was buried in emptiness without anything and fell asleep there.

The emptiness inside someone was capable of making that person thinking that she was resting. However, the truth was that she was lying on a drifting raft without any safety equipment.

Although she had a long and deep sleep, it only made her even more tired and stressed.

“Your Grace, Your Grace.”

She barely managed to fall asleep, but then someone called her. The clear voice wasn’t Ann’s that woke her up every day.

“Your Grace, it’s time to wake up.”

Rubica managed to open her eyes that were almost stuck. Her eyes felt dry and painful. Elise was looking down on her worriedly.

“Here, hot towel.”

Rubica got up and Elise offered her a hot towel instead of a basin of water to wash her face.

Rubica closed her eyes again and put the towel on her face, and it made her moan immediately.

She had cried so much last night that she could feel her eyes and face were swollen without even seeing a mirror.

“Where’s Ann?”

“She said she was going to His Grace’s office to meet him.”

“Really?”

Rubica had also gone to Edgar’s office to see him once, but the butler kicked her out, saying the duke was busy with work and couldn’t be bothered. Then he went in, with that strange dried plant Edgar liked and a cup.

‘... so Ann can go in there?’

Again, great tiredness came to her like a tidal wave. She was supposed to feel much lighter after a good night’s sleep, but now she felt so tired as if she were very sick.

Elise watched a maid changing the hot towel till Rubica’s swelling went down then brought a basin of water.

She was still learning from Ann and had never served Rubica before, therefore she felt so nervous for doing it alone without the housekeeper.